So... today my heart has settled on writing about the time period women (birth moms) have to change their mind AFTER signing the relinquishment papers. For Nicole, it was I believe a couple of months.. for me.. it was Nothing. Just the way I wanted it.
Opinions vary tremendously on the time period that should be available to birth moms, and if there should be one available at all for them to change their minds. Well honestly although I would hear out these other said opinions, I don't give a monkey's behind about them. But here is mine...Give us birth moms time after relinquishing? Yes.
Require mandatory counseling prior to being able to retract their decision? YES.
Make the time a reasonable time (ie. not months), like a week? Yes.
Contrary to my post about this topic last year Time is a Crime where I stated I absolutely was not in favor of this grace period, I have changed my views slightly. Like I said, I did not have this time available after signing the relinquishment papers nor did I want it and that has NOT changed. I honestly wouldn't wish a grace period on any birth parent because who wouldn't want to change their mind after placing their child for adoption, but do I believe that a REASONABLE time period should be instated, I do. One thing I have learned is not every adoption is the same.
I've always been a firm believe that adoption is not right for everyone or the answer in every case, and although I'm an advocate and happy with my decision... every birth mom didn't have the supportive individuals I had around me who ensured it was absolutely solely my decision.
However with in reason do I think that their decision can be over turned. I think they should mandate counseling for their birth mom to make sure it is not just part of the normal grieving process (ie. missing their child), as to why they think the best decision would now be to parent. And have the counselor speaking with the birth mother, to be a major role in the determining factor of in fact, allowing the veto of the adoption process.
All in All, I'm proud of my decision to place and am continuing to spread the positivity of adoption. On the other hand, unless you are a birth mother (especially as a state politician) I don't believe you have the right to make a valid ruling nor opinion one way or another on this issue. The end.
Sincerely, Joniece.
Although I may be losing this challenge, I am going to try and post more. My next post will be on the term "Placing or Giving up".
Remember if you ever have any questions and/or concerns please do not hesitate to e-mail me; Jonieceloya@hotmail.com ( I have loved receiving e-mails from those of you who I have)
To see additional posts, click on "Older Posts."
1 comments:
Great post. I get so hung up on the ethical stuff and as an adoptive parent, I know my opinions are weighted in that direction, yet it is so important to be ethical and fair. I really like your idea of having counseling be mandatory before reversing the decision.
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